Use My Voice

Speaking up about the issues I can't get out of my head or heart.

Tough Decisions

on July 22, 2012

This is the first post I’ve written that I’m not sure if I will actually post. I fear posting it might cause me to lose friends or to have people believe that I have become completely brainwashed into liberal ideology. Please know that this post comes from a person who tries to live by what Jesus called the two greatest commandments. I try to love God with all of my being and I try to love my neighbor as myself. Those things aren’t always easy and I fail at them often. However that is the filter I try to use to view my relationship with Christ, the world, my place in it, and what I am supposed to stand up for.

With all of that said here goes. I think the Boy Scouts are wrong to not allow homosexuals participate in any way in their organization. There I said it. I say this as someone whose  family is very involved in Cub Scouts and believe that it is an organization that does a lot of things right. My oldest son is entering his last year of Cub Scouts and plans to cross over to Boy Scouts next spring. Since he was eight he has said he will be an Eagle Scout one day. My husband is his Den Leader and the Committee Chair for the pack. My younger son is anxiously waiting to enter the 1st grade so that he can be a Tiger Cub. My family has benefited greatly from Scouts and if we are to continue with them I have no doubt it will continue to be a great experience.

To continue or not is the question my family faces right now. I do believe what they are doing is discrimination. They are singling out a group of people and saying, “you can’t join”. There is no other way to put it. I can not imagine there would be any other form of discrimination that I would be ok with. If the Boy Scouts were to say. minorities can not participate, or people with special needs, or families that are not Christians, we would have never gotten involved.  However this week as they reaffirmed their decision my husband and I have begun to feel uneasy.

You can say the Bible says homosexuality is a sin and I’m not going to argue that point with you because the Bible says a lot of things are sins. Gossip, back stabbing, laziness, premarital heterosexual sex, etc…. I do not see any of these sins listed as something that disqualifies a boy from participating or an adult from leading. If an unmarried adult leader was having sex with his girl friend there is nothing to stop him from leading. If a boy is lazy or disrespectful to his parents there is nothing to stop hm from joining. Why is this one thing that something that disqualifies a group of people from participating?

So our problem comes as to what do we do for our family? What decision do we make for our children? How much do we tell them (especially the 10-year-old)? Do we force our oldest to quit something he has worked very hard at and has achievement in when there are not many areas in his life that he is recognized for achievement? Is there value in staying with an organization and trying to be an agent for change?

We do not have answers for those questions yet. We stayed up late last night talking about them. We have decided we will fulfill our commitments for this year. We will take this year to pray and talk about it. I really don’t know what we will decide.


I welcome your thoughts and input I just ask you to be respectful. Respectful that this is a decision that we are struggling with so whichever side you would choose please show us grace as we try to find the answer that is right for us. I also ask that in your comments that you be respectful of others. This is a highly personal topic and I do not want anyone called names or spoken disrespectfully to on my blog.




4 responses to “Tough Decisions

  1. Noel says:

    The only thing I was going to suggest was what you have already considered… Continue with BSA and be the advocate for change. Maybe one day he will be on the committee making those changes or just be a voice of Jesus reasoning. I understand it’s hard for you and your family. All I can really offer is my prayer and support.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I am so proud of your honesty and vulnerability. I

  3. ajoyinca says:

    David & I have struggled on this topic and had many discussions about it. In Boy Scouts the leaders are in the position as a role model for the boys and an addict or drunkard would not meet “role model” qualifications required of a Scout leader. I don’t believe their discrimination is aimed at homosexuals but at maintaining certain (conservative) standards in their leadership.

    Obviously leaders can not be sin-less, but it’s similar to leaders within a church…A cheating husband doesn’t qualify to spiritually lead a church body….his lifestyle would appear to not mesh with the Biblical call to faithfulness in marriage!

    Anyway, just a few thoughts.

    • usemyvoice says:

      This use to be the stance I took on this but however I realized this is the only “moral standard” that the BSA set out. There is nothing about premarital or extamarital sex for leaders or any other moral or life style issues in their requirements to be a leader. I would be less inclined to think of it as discrimination if they had a more consistent policy, in the way many churches do.

      Really my bigger issue comes with the fact that they will not let openly gay boys join either. Where as a church might not allow people to be in leadership they would ( at least I hope they would ) allow them to participate in other areas of church life. The BSA has said if you are homosexual we do not want you in anyway associated with our organization.

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